Hatred

I am starting to get really annoyed and frustrated with my life lately. Things just never goes the way I want it to be. I am really really REALLY ANNOYED WITH MY LIFE!!! I do not want to live my life with hatred hating everything and anything!

I just cannot seem to do ANYTHING right!! I HATE it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just wtf on earth am I to do. I cannot please everyone. Maybe I am just fucking selfish. Maybe I just please myself. But I have never experienced anything like this before!! Can't you give me time!? I guess not. You have never thought that I was not allowed this kind of experience when I was younger. What was the reason!? It was YOU people that robbed me of that experience for me when I was younger. So I guess I am the one to be fucking blamed!?!?

WOW! Life is just FUCKING GREAT for me huh!? I do not have it easy as you think!!! Do you not think that I beat myself up on the inside just because I cannot find a fucking decent job that suits me!!?!?!?!?!!!! Do you think that your dissapointment in me is greater than the disappointment that I feel on my fucking self!?!? I cannot take it anymore. If this continues to go on. I think I will start hating everything. Losing trust and confidence in this life. Please do not drive me to insanity or to the edge of my life. I treasure each and every one of you. But do you not think that I am stressed as well?

God, please give me the strength to carry on. I'm really tired of the pressure from my family. Yes, I have a degree cert. SO WHAT THE FUCK!? ITS JUST A PIECE OF FUCKING PAPER!!! Sometimes I just wish that I did not give in and studied that degree paper. I should have just done what I wanted. What I liked.

I do not want to live my life full of hate. Please, do not push me to that extent...